{"id":12861,"date":"2022-10-18T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2022-10-18T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.scotwork.com\/nz\/blog-nz\/negotiation-is-not-a-bad-word\/"},"modified":"2022-10-18T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2022-10-18T00:00:00","slug":"negotiation-is-not-a-bad-word","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.scotwork.com\/nz\/blog-nz\/2022\/negotiation-is-not-a-bad-word\/","title":{"rendered":"Negotiation is not a bad word"},"content":{"rendered":"<article class=\"article__content\">\n<p>This past week, I had the strangest realization: Some people perceive negotiation as a bad thing! This discovery came while working with a client who was reluctant to negotiate with his colleagues. The reason? He didn\u2019t want to be \u201cthat guy.\u201d I\u2019m not even sure what \u201cthat guy\u201d means, but it got me curious about how many other people view negotiation this way. I had several conversations, and the answers I received are the very reasons why I do what I do.<\/p>\n<p>The truth is, while there are many different ways to resolve conflict, negotiation is one of the most effective means of creating value for all involved and preserving relationships.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>So, I posed a follow-up question to the people I\u2019d spoken with: \u201cWhy?\u201d Here are their most common responses:<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cBecause I feel like it\u2019s all about winning and screwing over someone else.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cBecause that\u2019s what bullies do, and I\u2019m not a bully.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cBecause I don\u2019t like to compromise.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cBecause I hate saying \u2018no\u2019 all the time.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cBecause it\u2019s easier to just give in and move on.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve read any of my posts, you know that I don\u2019t feel this way, but you might be working with people or have people in your life who do. Heck,\u00a0<em>you<\/em>\u00a0might feel this way! Regardless, here\u2019s my view regarding each response.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Winning:<\/strong>\u00a0Negotiation is not about winning or losing. It\u2019s about creating the best possible outcome that everyone can support. The worst thing you could do is put together a deal that\u2019s so lopsided, no one will see it through, or one that\u2019s so onerous, the other side puts all of its effort into tearing it apart instead of supporting it. Deals that aren\u2019t supported or executed don\u2019t have any winners at all.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Bullies:<\/strong>\u00a0I agree that there are people who have only one tool in their toolbox: pounding their fists and attempting to bully. They keep doing it because it\u2019s probably worked for them more often than not. But those people are leaving a lot of value on the table. The most successful negotiators have a broad range of tools at their disposal and can adjust their approach accordingly, without being a bully. More importantly, they operate in a manner that allows them to be true to themselves. In fact, most bullies aren\u2019t actually negotiating \u2014 they\u2019re just trying to impose their will.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Compromise:<\/strong>\u00a0There\u2019s no compromise in negotiating, just trading. That\u2019s what negotiation is about: trading things of lesser importance to you in return for things of greater importance. It\u2019s not about compromising value and accepting less than. Quite to the contrary: Skilled negotiators give value to get value. It\u2019s more like a bartering system: trading items of value, not conceding value.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u201cNo\u201d:<\/strong>\u00a0Negotiating isn\u2019t about \u201cno.\u201d It\u2019s about \u201cyes.\u201d There\u2019s no power in \u201cno.\u201d If there were, then parents would have to say \u201cno\u201d to their children only once. However, there\u2019s lots of power in \u201cyes.\u201d I think this is one of the most fun parts of negotiating: finding ways I can say \u201cyes\u201d to the other side in a manner that\u2019s acceptable to me (i.e., giving them what they want on my terms). When you can be the \u201cyes\u201d person, you can make a lot of things happen.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Giving In:<\/strong>\u00a0It\u2019s one of the easiest and fastest ways to get past a conflict, but it\u2019s not the most effective. Many of us have done it, and we\u2019ve dealt with the consequences. As soon as we give in, we\u2019re expected to do so in the future. Negotiating helps manage precedent. It ensures that your generosity is not overlooked, but is duly rewarded (through trading, of course).<\/p>\n<p>All of this underscores, for me, the importance of knowing how to negotiate effectively. We know how poorly people do it. We know they aren\u2019t creating value. We know they\u2019re straining relationships. And we know they\u2019re wasting a lot of time in the process. That\u2019s why our mission is to transform the way the world negotiates: We can draw a straight line between how we resolve conflict in the boardroom all the way to the family room. If we\u2019re better at negotiating in the boardroom, then we\u2019ll be better at doing it everywhere else. That\u2019s how we\u2019ll transform the world.<br\/><br\/><br\/><strong>We Can Help Your Team Understand and Harness the Power of Negotiation.<br\/><\/strong>Does your team think negotiation is about compromise, saying \u201cno,\u201d or even bullying? The truth is, negotiation is an extremely effective skill, and if they learn to use it properly, they can create value for all involved and preserve relationships. We can help! Drawing on nearly 50 years of real-world negotiating experience, we\u2019ll assist you with getting better deals, saving time, and creating value for all involved \u2014 not to mention preserving and even strengthening relationships. Let us partner you with one of our advisers, ensuring that you\u2019ve got the broadest view of your deal.<\/p>\n<p>Contact one of our experts today.<\/p>\n<p>P: 042979069<\/p>\n<p>E: <a href=\"mailto:info@scotwork.co.nz\">info@scotwork.co.nz<\/a><\/p>\n\n<\/article>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This past week, I had the strangest realization: Some people perceive negotiation as a bad thing! This discovery came while working with a client who was reluctant to negotiate with his colleagues. The reason? He didn\u2019t want to be \u201cthat guy.\u201d I\u2019m not even sure what \u201cthat guy\u201d means, but it got me curious about&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":65,"featured_media":12862,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"_legacy_url":"blog-nz\/2022\/negotiation-is-not-a-bad-word\/","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12861","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.8.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Negotiation is not a bad word | Scotwork NZ Negotiation Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"World leaders in business negotiation training and consultancy with experts across 120 countries, with negotiation courses taught in 29 languages.\" 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